But what about those times of involuntary painful sex. When penetration of any kind hurts or stings, and just can’t happen? Does this sound familiar to you? If so, you’re part of a large group. According to a study performed by the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University, about 30% of all women between the ages of 18 to 59 reported some difficulty with pain the last time they had sex.
Reasons for pain during sex range from bacteria vaginosis to urinary tract infections to vulvodynia. They wreak havoc on your libido, diminish your sexual self-esteem, and steal the fun from your sex life. How can you begin to end the pain and bring back the pleasure?
The first step is to keep an open channel of communication with your partner. Help your partner understand what’s happening and keep your partner included in planning and even implementing the solution. While you’re exploring options, keep the passion going with other paths to pleasure, such as oral sex, mutual masturbation, and a handy, dandy mini-vibrator for outside stimulation.
After meeting with your gynecologist and after identifying/ruling out any structural or other issues, including allergies that might be causing discomfort and/or vaginal imbalance (detergents, condoms, birth control, etc.), invest in a high quality natural lubricant. Some of your symptoms may be due to vaginal dryness. Adding a water-based organic lubricant like Aloe Cadabra often restores ease and comfort to a remarkable degree. Trust me on this; you’ll love how it feels, even how it looks!
Exercising your vagina is another effective way to improve your sex life while having fun at the same time. I highly recommend trying a pair of Ben Wa Balls via Adam and Eve’s sensational selection, and you’ll see why many women have loved their Ben Wa Balls for years!
Invented hundreds of years ago, Ben Wa Balls enhance sexual stimulation and exercise your kegel muscles all at once. (Remember those clever little ‘toys’ oh fans of Fifty Shades of Grey?) Since the balls are weighted, you will need to use the muscles in your vagina to hold them in. You can also squeeze on the elastic silicone or increase resistance by tugging on them. Doing these exercises will expand, tighten and firm your vagina muscles. If that doesn’t sound remarkably beneficial, then I give up!
Take more time to enjoy foreplay, and experiment with different positions for greater comfort. Even a small change in your or your partner’s position can often work like a charm. It’s also extremely important to stay properly hydrated, especially if you are a coffee drinker and (dare I say it?) a smoker.
Finally, by all means enjoy a delicious post-coidal snuggle and cuddle. One or more of these techniques and solutions may restore or significantly improve overall comfort and enjoyment while heightening the intimacy and satisfaction of those penetrating, sensual moments. What the heck, try them all!
For more ideas on how to have a happy, joyous and totally satisfying sex life… visit Bring Back Desire!