22 Sex Terms You Need To Know

22 Sex Terms You Need To KnowBetween Fifty Shades of Grey and Cosmopolitan, it’s easy to feel completely clueless about many sex terms. Since they’re usually not found on Dictionary.com, I thought I’d put together a list to help all of us stay hip with the sex lingo. (Especially handy for those times when you think someone is ordering an exotic drink… and they’re actually ordering something entirely different!)

Double Feature

To have sexual intercourse with two people in the same day.

High Dive

A “high dive” is what you do when you pull your erect penis all the way out of your partner and then penetrate her in one fell swoop. (Make sure she’s adequately lubricated!)

Vanilla Sex

Vanilla sex is regular, straightforward intercourse between a man and a woman of legal age. There are a handful of positions acceptable for vanilla sex, with missionary position being the most vanilla.

Kinky Sex

Kinky Sex is anything that’s not “vanilla” sex. Kinky sex can include fetishes, BDSM, role playing, acting out fantasies, and using toys, props, or games. Don’t be afraid to experiment with kinky sex.

Bargain Basement

If you are hanging out in a “bargain basement” you are in a bar, club, or restaurant where people who want to find an easy partner for sex only go “shopping” for such. Think of it as a specialized “meet market.”


BSDM stands for bondage and discipline, sadism and masochism. BDSM between consenting adults can run the gamut from gentle restraints (think being tied to the bed with a necktie) to the “red room of pain” made popular by Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy.

Sailor’s Cup of Tea

If a guy asks if you would like a “sailor’s cup of tea,” don’t bust out the fine china quite yet. This term refers to anal sex. If you are not into it, kindly tell him you would prefer another beverage.


“Barebacking” involves engaging in sexual penetration without using protection (condoms).


A safe word is the most vital implement in any consensual sex act that involves power play in which one person is dominating another person. With a safe word, everybody involved knows that his or her boundaries and safety will be respected. It should NOT be something like “no,” or “stop,” because in role-playing, “forcing” someone to do something is an important component of the play. A good safe word is something that you would never say in the course of sex play.


A fetish is something– a prop or body part– that a person requires in order to be sexually aroused. Some people cannot become sexually aroused without the fetish object present, while for others the fetish merely improves their sexual experience.

Dental dam

Used to perform oral sex on a woman, a dental dam is usually made of sheer latex and is used as protection for safer sex amid cunnilingus.


A more tame term, “frottage” refers to rubbing against someone for sexual pleasure without actually engaging in sexual penetration of any kind. It’s also referred to as “dry humping.”


To put it bluntly, “queef” refers to a vaginal fart. Sometimes, when the penis goes all the way in the vagina and all the way out periodically, air gets trapped within the vaginal walls causing the expulsion of air


Although some people cringe at the thought, others love the idea of “shrimping,” which basically refers to sucking or licking your partner’s toes before, during or even after sex.


When a woman performs fellatio on a man and he ejaculates, she keeps the ejaculate in her mouth and then proceeds to kiss him. The two swap the ejaculate back and forth until one person finally swallows it.


Battery Operated Boyfriend, or vibrator. When your friend says, tonight I have a date with my boyfriend “Bob,” that actually means she is hanging at home with takeout, reality TV, and her loyal man, who runs on AAA batteries.

The Menthol

The act of performing oral sex on someone while or after eating a mint.


“Those are boobs I would like to motorboat,” you may have heard one of your guy pals say. He is simply referring to his desire to plant his face in between aforementioned woman’s breasts, blow, and shake his face back and forth. Sometimes men really are not that complicated. This will entertain him for hours.

Prince Albert

When a man refers to his “Prince Albert,” no he is not chumming around with royalty. This term refers to a piercing of the penis.


Unlike the giant gas-guzzling car of the same name, a Hummer is a truly simple and wonderful thing. Performed on either a man or a woman, it is simply the act of humming while performing oral sex. If their goodies are snug in your mouth when you hum, it adds an absolutely lovely vibration. You don’t have to do it the whole time, but it’s a nice accent here and there.


Polyamory is the practice of having committed and loving relationships with more than one person. In a polyamorous relationship, either partner can have additional partners. Unlike swinging, these are “real” relationships, not just sex.


Think of someone taking a teabag and dunking it in and out of their teacup several times to get the best flavor. It’s kinda the same thing, but with your man’s balls and your nice wet mouth.

Sexting Acronyms:

TDTM: Talk Dirty To Me

IWSN: I Want Sex Now

GYPO: Get Your Pants Off

GNOC: Get Naked On Camera

GNRN: Get Naked Right Now

NIFOC: Naked in Front of Computer

RUH: Are You Horny?

8: Oral Sex

143: I Love You

Did I miss any of your favorite sex terms? Add them to the list in the comments section below!

© 2013 Ande Lyons, Bring Back Desire LLC

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  1. Fawn Weaver says:

    LOL! I finally know what motorboating means! I heard them mention it on the CMA’s and it got aot of laughs but I didn’t hear the part that preceded it so I had no idea what they were talking about. Thank you for enlightening me to something I never have to worry about my husband doing (since I have more molehills than mountains :)).

    • Ande says:

      Woo Hoo Fawn! You had me laughing out loud with your comment – thank you! I’d heard motorboating for years and was absolutely clueless… who knew? Wishing you joy, love and laughter! Ande

  2. Dan Parker says:

    Had a client who told me that she had a new boyfriend named “BOB”… She said he didn’t hog the remote….didn’t take her money….never said anything disrepectful… I said where does he live? …She said “In a box under my bed”. She had me thinking he was a nice regular guy… Memorable law office story !

  3. Dan Parker says:

    Ok….Here’s a term for you Ande…. “face dance” ….It’s a salivating lap dance ! …and frequently breathless !!!

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